fighting for free hearts

Fixing What’s Wrong With Men’s Accountability Groups

If you are a man who has been a Christian for more than a couple of years, chances are you have heard about accountability groups. It’s likely you’ve even been in one _ or several, for that matter.

But it’s rare to find one that really makes a difference and gets us past the heart-numbing mediocrity and failure which exhibits itself in an endless cycle of: Sin, then  Self-Contempt, then Confession _ Repeat.

There are other options. Men’s accountability groups should be a band of brothers, WarriorPoets, more than they should resemble domesticated tea parties.

As my group met recently, we dived in to the deeper waters of our hearts and there were tears and honest admissions about the core issues of our lives. Proverbs 20:5 tells us that the purposes of a man’s heart are deeper waters, but a man of understanding draws them out.

What’s wrong with men’s accountability groups is that they don’t apply Prov. 20:5. If all we do is get together and pretend to be real; talk about our lives in guarded terms; and refuse to risk, then we will simply become masters of disguise. Once in a while our swords should get blood on them.

i spent plenty of years hiding out in so-called accountability groups. It was rather easy, actually. For those men who long to see their addiction conquered, the days of playing Houdini must end.

And a couple of “Yes” or “No” questions that don’t plunge into the deep waters of our lives only make it that much easier to go on sinning.

The foundation, the core needs, of a good accountability group are found in the pillars of the Society of WarriorPoets:

  1. True Identity _ We are made in the image of God.
  2. Authenticity _ No pretending. Ever.
  3. Reliance on Christ _ He alone is life.
  4. Risk _ Stop playing it safe. Renounce passivity.

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