fighting for free hearts

Winter Into Spring, Then Back Again (Sort Of)

Every March/April around where i live, Spring arrives with beautiful sunny days and very nice, warm temperatures.

All of a sudden, people are outside; it’s shorts weather and you see smiles all round.

Then, Winter tries to take it back.

But the thing is: Spring will win. We know that, because that is the trajectory of the seasons.

The other night in our WarriorPoets’ meeting, a couple of guys were sharing how the past week had been difficult for them with temptation to look at porn or act out.

They were sober as they relayed the events. They had engaged in “cruising,” which is when you go looking for something, but you don’t go with a full head of steam to the adult bookstore.

“Cruising” activities include clicking on an advertisement on line which is not actually pornographic, but is slightly enticing; and you know that you will be dancing on the fringe of acceptable viewing material.

One man, still in the very early days of his confession and journey, was deeply bothered — and rightly so. It was the first time he had gone “cruising”‘ in the two months since he came clean to his wife and started battling his addiction.

There is always a temptation to despair when you feel those old inclinations again, especially so soon after weeks of real growth. But this is like Winter trying to take back Spring.

Spring will come. New life will blossom where once things were barren. And just like with the weather, this man who is serious and hungry in his pursuit of righteousness, the initial growth is legitimate.

He will continue towards more and more life and health if he stays engaged in the journey and the battle.

Sometimes when it is cold and gray, we have a hard time remembering that. The Enemy wants to cause fear and despair; telling us that none of this so-called growth was real or makes any difference.

But the difference is real. And the evidence is that this man was properly sober and appropriately concerned about his “cruising” activity, which would not have been his response three months ago. He also refused to give up hope, which is serious evidence of change.

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