fighting for free hearts

Self-Medication, Self-Destruction

The other night as the WarriorPoets gathered, one man — fairly new to the group — used the phrase all addicts know well:  “Self-Medication.”

In telling some details of his story, this man readily admitted that when he runs to Pornography, Lust and Masturbation, it is many times to medicate the pain in his life.

The pain of disappointment. The pain of feeling like a failure. The pain of embarrassment. The list of reasons why we run to self-medication is longer than i can run through here.

The cruelty is that once we have run to our drug for that “medication,” we realize that the pain from which we sought comfort  still haunts us.

So many times i would turn off a porn video, or close a magazine or finish with a fantasy, and instantly the pain from which i ran was right on top of me again.  And this time with the added burden of the guilt i carried for the sin i had just committed.

Porn, Lust and Masturbation are an endless cycle of defeat and death, which actually spirals ever downward into darker and darker areas.  It will destroy you, as it says in Proverbs 5:1-14:

1 My son, pay attention to my wisdom,
listen well to my words of insight,
2 that you may maintain discretion
and your lips may preserve knowledge.
3 For the lips of an adulteress drip honey,
and her speech is smoother than oil;
4 but in the end she is bitter as gall,
sharp as a double-edged sword.
5 Her feet go down to death;
her steps lead straight to the grave.[a]
6 She gives no thought to the way of life;
her paths are crooked, but she knows it not.

7 Now then, my sons, listen to me;
do not turn aside from what I say.
8 Keep to a path far from her,
do not go near the door of her house,
9 lest you give your best strength to others
and your years to one who is cruel,
10 lest strangers feast on your wealth
and your toil enrich another man’s house.
11 At the end of your life you will groan,
when your flesh and body are spent.
12 You will say, “How I hated discipline!
How my heart spurned correction!
13 I would not obey my teachers
or listen to my instructors.
14 I have come to the brink of utter ruin
in the midst of the whole assembly.”

How incredibly close so many of us have come to self-destruction.

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