fighting for free hearts

Blog Round Up 06.23.12

Michael John Cusick, author of Surfing For God, writes this week on how porn affects the brain — actually this is Part 2.

It seems many folks are writing about this topic lately,  i have posted about it before.  It’s certainly worth repeating.

Culturally it appears that we are living in willful denial on this issue.

We seem to want to believe that viewing pornography has no effect on us.

Cusick’s latest post is just another reminder that we are actually changed by our experiences with porn.

And when it comes to our experiences with pornography, we definitely need accountability; however, the question always arise: “Should my wife be my accountability partner?” And if not, how much should i tell her about the daily ins and outs of my struggles?

Breaking Free tackled this topic this week here.

What we practice in our Intentional Warriors group is a two-part process. First, we strongly discourage men from having their wives as accountability partners.  Second, we practice full disclosure when it comes to incidents where we have acted out by either masturbating or looking at pornography.  So the approach we believe to be both Biblical and healthy is honesty with our wives but not a thorough discussion of every thought or every time we took a second look at a certain woman.  We do expect that in our male accountability relationships there will be thorough discussion.

And good discussions are crucial for us fathers who want to pass along wisdom to our kids about porn and technology, as one blogger at xxxchurch posted.  Parenting in this age is difficult.  The various porn delivery systems and the sheer volume of porn available makes it a daunting task.  But for those of us who have been addicted to porn, we know how important it is.

At Huffington Post, marriage and family therapist Virginia Gilbert tackled the issue of whether a wife should divorce her husband who is a sex addict — not always a cut-and-dried situation.

i have seen wives take the first opportunity to get out of the marriage.  i have seen wives stick it out and work toward healing, with the result being an amazing transformation of the marriage.

i know my wife contemplated divorce, even if ever so briefly, when she discovered my pornography addiction.  Ultimately she didn’t.  Our marriage is better than ever now and i think divorce would have wreaked havoc with our lives and the lives of our children.

 

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